The Wisdom or Not of Trying to Change Another Person
We have all been there before; a spouse, a coworker, a friend who is just rubbing us the wrong way. If only they could see the error of their ways, if they could be different, then all would be well. What could I say or do that would convince them how wrong they are and the harm they are causing? What of peace? Do they not want peace as much as I do? If only they would change.
But as much as we believe they are not right, they are just as likely to believe we are not right. These conflicting energies create a stalemate that can lead to heated exchanges and arguments. And so, what do we do? Many people search for even more data to convince the other that we are right. We even filter opposing information to ensure we get the right facts that finally proves we are right.
And yet, despite our efforts, our arguments, our data, our proof, we are not likely to succeed and we will be tired, stressed and frustrated. Wisdom knows such a path is futile.
At this point society generally leaves us with the following choices:
· Continue the argument with renewed efforts to get even better data to support our cause
· Give up wanting the other person to change (few do)
· Leave the relationship (many do)
But there is another choice. It is a radical one and even though it is an easier and more joyful path, many will NOT choose it because of what they must do.
Underlying every relationship is a complex interrelationship of energies that constantly repels and attracts. Because energy seeks homeostasis, change at the level of form is difficult. But if you change the underlying energy, the laws of physics say that everything that is in relationship with the new energy will have to change as well. And this is when change comes easily.
We already know that the other person is not willing to change their view; therefore, their energy will not change. It is up to you. This is wisdom from your Soul which understands that real change must come from within.
You must now get real with yourself. What is the other person mirroring for me that I am unwilling to look at that is also within me? Perhaps the other person is angry over the smallest of things. Where is there anger within me? What might I be angry at? For the greatest gain, you must be ruthlessly honest with yourself. Otherwise excuses will be made, life will continue as before and you will not grow spiritually. All relationships mirror the energies we are holding within ourselves. Free those energies and everything else must and will change.
Sarah (not her real name) was a woman in her 60’s, a caregiver and guardian of her mother. Her mother was always belligerent and angry toward her daughter and would often tell her how worthless she was and how she hated her. No matter what Sarah did, how good the care she gave, how many things she helped with, her mother never changed. Sarah tried many times to reason with her mother but nothing changed. Sarah was exhausted and resented giving care to her mother.
Sarah decided to look at the energy within herself. She began to use our breathing technique, the Breath of I, daily for the next few weeks. Sarah discovered how hard she was on herself and how little love there was of Self. The energies slowly shifted and within three weeks of beginning the program her mother said, “What is different? There is something different about you.” And then she said, “I love you.” Words not spoken by mother to daughter for years. A miracle? Not really. Just a shifting of energies.
The energy of the breath, when used in certain ways and with the right intention, is a catalyst to shift energy. The breath produces a higher vibration energy that entrains lower energies to a higher vibratory state. You will feel lighter, more joyful, energized and even playful.
The Masters of Life know that problems are not problems in and of themselves but are the effect of memories replaying in the Subconscious Mind. Wisdom knows there is no one to blame, only acceptance of responsibility for the creation of our experiences. Having created them, we can now create something new. Wisdom knows the answers lie within.
Join us for our FREE Meditation, "Accessing Divine Wisdom", on www.BodyMindSpiritRADIO.com at 9pm EST on Tuesday, March 22, or for our program "How to Change Another Person or Anything in 28 Days or Less".
You will learn the Breath of I and be amazed at the results. The program will be held at BodyWorks Healing Center in Plymouth on Sunday, March 20.
By Dave Krajovic
About the writer: Dave Krajovic
David Krajovic MBA, CPA, CMT David and his wife Pat are dynamic and engaging partners to anyone who desires to restore personal power, find inner peace and live an Inspired Life. They founded the award-winning BodyWorks Healing Center in Plymouth, MI, the Global Breath Institute and are the co-creators of Ascension Breathwork. They have created a revolutionary body of work combining contemporary and ancient teachings to help you ascend above limitation and access the human potential. Their Inspired Life Mastery programs gently yet powerfully disintegrate obstructions to happiness, good health, peace, prosperity and spirituality. 734-416-5200 or ascensionbreathing.com