Being You Is Enough
A person can only see you to the degree they see themselves.
Self-awareness is the ability to step out of conditions and circumstances. Self-acceptance is the crucial ingredient to greater embodied self-awareness. Most people try to mentally will themselves into a positive focus, creating a continual struggle to “think positive.” Self-acceptance is the doorway into an abiding peace that is beyond understanding and the mind.
Your mind is the servant to your heart. Even if you are very positive or use your mental will to manifest all sorts of “goodies” in your life, what you truly feel about yourself will eventually take hold in your body and life.
We base our happiness on the external world: what people think, how much money we have, our performance, how much we get done, how much we help others, and so on. Self-acceptance is deep inner work and a huge shift away from external identifiers. The world can no longer define your inner environment when you know the love, beauty, and prosperity that you truly are.
Anything that triggers an emotion other than peace within you is because you are asking for that person or event to validate your worth. The emotion, if other than peace, is the very part of you that needs love. This is why self-acceptance is a daily and moment-to-moment practice that leads you into truly knowing that life is for you. Your life is the life of God. Your everyday life and relationships are seeking to teach you about your Authentic Self and true brilliance.
We are just re-experiencing ourselves if we are not self-aware. Daily meditation and self-acceptance work helps you to see that you can only experience your thoughts and beliefs. You will experience the reality in your head… independent of what is happening in your life. The lens you look through (your beliefs, stories, lived patterns) define your “reality.” If you don't “take the lens off” and observe with self-acceptance, your life will not change.
Authentic Self contains your flaws, brilliance, and gifts. Realizing your embodied Authentic Self comes from loving all parts of yourself. As a child when you were yourself, you were either not seen or told in some way that being you was not good. Your parents simply did not have the self-awareness (or capacity) to see outside of their own thoughts and feelings, but this does not mean that they were bad parents. Unless your parents did daily self-acceptance and inner work, they couldn't truly see you because they had not seen themselves.
Many will think that their self-identity is their beliefs and opinions. “I think therefore I am” should be, “I think therefore I am dead.” How can we allow our current understanding to grow if we become so identified with our thoughts and beliefs? “Beliefs and thoughts are just placeholders in consciousness” --Dr. Michael Beckwith. The power and spirit you truly are, doesn't need your beliefs to be Real.
The world cannot give you anything because you have been given everything already. Being yourself is enough... to heal your body... to change your life... to help another.
“Kevin's” session is a representation of many of my previous clients as well as some recent self-acceptance sessions. Through his inner work, Kevin had caught the vision and direction for his life. However, when he shared his vision with his wife, he triggered her own unloved pain. Childhood fear and unworthiness arose within her and then she added stories such as: “He will outgrow me!” and “He won't have enough time for me and the kids!” and “Does my opinion matter... do I matter?” Kevin immediately felt this and would then judge himself, and think: “Being myself does hurt another. This is proof! I can't be me and be loved.”
All minds are one: what you feel and think is felt by another. Did you ever notice that when you have been in “judge-y mind” with another how they just intuitively don't like you? Our thoughts transmit energy. Like Kevin's wife being triggered by his choice to be more of himself, when you were your Authentic Self as a child, you triggered your parents’ own unloved pain. Feeling our parents’ emotional discomfort, we learned to be “something else” than our Authentic Self. As adults, we can learn to trust that our Authentic Self adds to another. Kevin manifested his vision by being true to himself and compassionately witnessing his wife's process.
This “other self” you have created is the source of all of your pain.
(physical and emotional)
Science has now found the autonomic neuro-peptide system in mind-body connection. All illness has a mind-body dysfunction. “It makes no difference (what dis-ease), since the purpose of all symptoms is the same---to distract conscious mind” (quoted from, "The Divided Mind-Epidemic of Mindbody Disorders" by John E. Sarno M.D.). If you know in your core that your Authentic Self is the energy that creates stars, and is the fullness of Creation... how can the complaining co-worker trigger you? If you felt in your bones the fullness of your true amazing Self… you would know that Being yourself was more than enough to solve the problem, help your loved one, or change your life.
All dis-ease is a disconnect from self-love. All suffering is a denial of our Authentic Self. Self-acceptance is the doorway into real freedom and feeling an embodied oneness with God. As you love yourself, you then allow everyday life (sunshine, a person, an animal) to love you. I have seen that when someone begins to love themselves, they powerfully affect their community and heal their family.
“Seek first the kingdom of God” means knowing that Being you is enough. Self-acceptance is advanced spiritual work. Most would rather change behavior or analyze the problem than accept themselves. This is the way we avoid the real inner work. You must love the ways you don't love yourself to realize that you are enough.
I love this work and it is my passion. I am so grateful to the hundreds of people that have courageously allowed me to help them in this process. We all need someone to reflect our Authentic Self and love our vulnerabilities.
Self-acceptance is a potent and powerful life process that is dismissed as weak or selfish. After seeing hundreds of people’s physical illnesses and emotional suffering heal through self-acceptance, I know that self-acceptance brings true healing. Self-acceptance is scary because it requires slowly letting go of this “other self” you created. If we are willing to do the inner work and ask for help... healing is possible... miracles are possible.
About the writer: Barbra White
Barbra White has a masters in transpersonal psychology and ecopsychology, Diploma of homeopathy, Reiki Master, and published author. She is a gifted intuitive, spiritual life coach and Earth Angel communicator.