Read this compelling drama and you will be more deeply equipped to insure the best medical care for your loved one even at death’s door, and survive this journey that will take you to the edge of your strength. Take it into the special space of the “Waiting Room”—a waiting room like no other when helping another traverse life’s final stage, where you go to catch your breath and seek some solace in sometimes suffocating grief. Learn survival and advocacy tips and then become aware of the pivotal part you play in your loved-one’s active dying, for what you do will continue to ripple forward in your life, and likely in your loved-one’s life beyond the veil.
It is unique in well-developed grief literature in that it combines:
· EMOTIONAL: The emotional experience of the primary caregiver in witnessing a dying loved one,
· FAMILY DYNAMICS: The gut-busting experiences of family discord in end-of-life decision-making,
· LEGAL &PATIENT ADVOCACY: Toolbag Tips to employ in the midst of deep grief and confusion,
· SPIRITUAL: A re-framing of the entire experience into the most sacred of spiritual journeys.
Because she is an Elder Law Attorney, Geriatric Care Manager, and most significantly, a sole caregiver of over twenty-two years, Sue Fabian relays this human experience fully laid bare—the twenty-seven day vigil she took in assisting her dying mother walking the bridge between this life and the next, and now hopes to lend a helping hand to those of you presently crossing similar bridges. She also seeks to help readers understand that this is a most sacred moment—helping to birth your loved one into the Great Beyond as their body dies away. It was this core concept, along with reaching out for the lifelines of family, friends, and spiritual helpers that helped her and will help you keep together head and heart while being torn by watching your loved one fade away.
Endorsements from hospice, clergy and university educators include:
· “It will help you know how to BE with your dying loved one while maintaining your sanity.”
· “Sue is especially insightful about the dilemmas of managing a loved one’s care within the American medical model that is fraught with inconsistencies, inefficiencies and sometimes, incompetence. Doesn’t anybody “get it”? Sue does!”
· “Birthing Death opens the window wide to the physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, legal and practical needs of the dying.”
· “Throughout the past 19 years as a parish minister and police and hospital chaplain, I have never before encountered such a courageous journey into the realm of living and dying…This book can be a great comfort and a useful tool while passing through the arduous and sacred process of loving, losing and living again…”
For more information, excerpts are available on the BLOG at www.ElderWiseAdvisor.com .
Available on Amazon, where a preview is also provided.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Tragedy struck early, when Sue’s father died at the age of forty-eight years of cancer, leaving a young mother and three children from ages nine to sixteen—Sue being the youngest.
She worked for Focus:HOPE—a civil and human rights organization born out of the ashes of Detroit’s 1967 riots, and helped launch the nation’s first supplemental food program for Detroit-area seniors, who otherwise were perpetually faced with the economic choice of buying food or medication.
Then in early October of 1980, she took the aptitude test for law school, not knowing whether her mother would survive the day when two days prior, her mother suffered a massive stroke at the age of sixty-eight. She was not expected to survive. Thus began Sue’s caregiving saga, culminating in this near-month vigil of her mother’s last days.
From Day 1 of entering law school in 1994, Sue knew she wanted to specialize in Elder Law and began a campaign in law school orientation to bring elder law into Wayne State University’s School of Law curriculum. She won the campaign when by her senior year, the class was finally taught. During this time, Sue won the Outstanding Woman Law Student award for her school, earned a Certificate in Gerontology from Wayne State’s Institute of Gerontology and launched her own Geriatric Care Management practice. Immediately upon passing the bar exam, she hung up her shingle as a solo practitioner in Elder Law, published material about determining capacity, and enjoys riding her motorcycle for down time!