The families we incarnate with are carefully chosen by our higher self, especially for us, for a number of reasons. Exploring these reasons, we may come to understand ourselves and our purpose in a given life and even across lifetimes.
Before you incarnate, your true self has a clear idea of what you need to accomplish. You pick parents and other relatives to provide you with hereditary traits you need, as well as the experiences and relationships that will provide structure and direction for growth throughout your lifetime.
Each of us on a higher level is an eternal spirit, a facet of God, evolving our soul through many lifetimes to be a vehicle for us within the world. Lifetimes are opportunities to develop soul qualities, gifts and strengths so that our eternal being can increasingly live and act within our soul. Seeing your life this way makes sense of a lot of the circumstances where you might ask yourself, “Why did I choose this experience?” “Whose idea was this!” It wasn’t the idea of your human level of being, it was the idea of your eternal self whose purposes can be hard to fathom! Let’s explore what your higher self might have been thinking when it designed these experiences for you!
Looking at your family and the hereditary gifts they have, your higher self might have been seeking intuition, a musical ear, artistic capabilities or intellect, all of which run in families. There will also be cultural influences and opportunities, social skills and personality traits. Or, you might have been seeking a lack of certain things for a number of reasons as well.
For instance, a non-nurturing family, abandonment or death of a parent may offer great opportunity for independent self-determination and freedom. A family with few financial means may actually motivate achievement more strongly than a family with abundance. A person’s will power and courage may grow stronger due to these kinds of challenges.
Sometimes, negative traits in families provide needed opportunities. A soul that is ready to grow strong will use negative family or social/cultural experiences to become someone opposite from those they grew up with. It can help a soul to overcome past negativity from earlier lifetimes and become a person of greater integrity and wholeness than if they’d had more positive qualities within their family or community.
Families are often made up of people who have incarnated together in multiple lifetimes. Many of them are in the same soul group, meaning they are working on learning and developing the same qualities and gifts. Often there are a couple of different soul groups, quite often oppositional to each other. Oppositional relationships are significant motivators for soul growth, which is why they exist. The challenges presented often stimulate more growth than more optimal circumstances would.
Where families have a long history of a particular negative trait, it is often the case that multiple members of the family are working to heal that trait. Where earlier ancestors may have manifested that negativity without conscience, having no compunction about it, later generations may begin to resolve those qualities and grow to be more conscious and positive. For example, with someone of your own generation looking at their past, their grandfather who was an alcoholic and rage –aholic may have ruled the family very harshly. Their father who was also an alcoholic and rage-aholic may feel bad about being that way and tried to be less violent and toxic–later in life they may have quit drinking and learned to be kinder. The person of your generation may have grown up choosing never to drink and by working through counseling or spiritual healing become a kind and considerate individual, even in their closest relationships.
Family healing across generations is tedious and slow, but looking back across time you can see how each generation has greater strength and integrity than the one previously. Because society as a whole is ascending to a higher vibration, consciousness and unity with our true selves, this trend toward greater enlightenment will continue to accelerate exponentially in the coming years.
As you grow to understand and value the gifts that came with your family, be they positive or negative, you can heal the damage and optimize the benefits of the experience. Where there is lingering pain, fear or disease, think of it as a message from your higher self that there is still more opportunity for growth within those circumstances. You may not like that message, but I can assure you that you will like having the gifts and greater happiness in your life when the work is done. That is not to recommend you stay in an abusive relationship, but that you continue to grow and heal. If you are like most people, you wish the challenges would just go away and leave you alone! Keep persevering, you are in the workout gym of life and your higher self has a beautiful vision of who you are becoming. You are perfect where you are now, and will be amazing as you come into greater and greater levels of unity with your own unique facet of The One Source of Life.
~by Eve Wilson