For pretty much my whole life, I’ve been obsessed with the idea that we all came here to do something special and significant. We all have a gift, maybe even more than one, or a few that stem from the main vein. I like to picture a wizardly divine being with etheric wings, like a teacher at Hogwarts who holds a magic scepter, implanting each soul on their way to becoming human with their unique divinely ordained gift. I know for certain if I didn’t have the gift to sing, I wouldn’t be alive today. I sang through the pain of a troubled past, extreme shyness, and anxiety. I found my strength and confidence as a young girl with my own successful band at the age of 19. I was able to start loving myself through what I loved to do.
I was consumed by this talent and identified wholeheartedly with this “thing” I could do. I was good at. It kept me sane and responsible. I had to show up six nights a week, and take care of myself and my voice. Daily vocal warm-ups, vocal training, and physical exercise. Sometimes I had to avoid certain foods and activities. I learned about commitment and devotion. Through many years of singing other people’s songs night after night, I learned about technique and control, and how to change my tone to sound like different artists.
I looked forward to being on stage every night. Some nights I would be lost in moments of complete and total bliss. I could feel Spirit move through me and sometimes others got lost along with me. Spirit gave me this gift to tell a story through music, words, and songs. It’s akin to the painter who shows up to the canvas, day after day as if touched by a spell. A painter must paint. But if by some twist of fate, you are not able to share your gift, it’s devastating. So you look for something else you love to do because your soul calls out for it.
For two years I wasn’t able to sing because of physical issues. I ached down to the marrow of my bones. For a good, while I thought it was me and my head, so I tried to beat it. For those years I was a wreck. No one can understand what that’s like until you go through it. I ended up finally having surgery to remove two very large fibroids pressing on my bladder, making it impossible for me to perform. During that time I looked for something else I loved to do. I had to. I loved to write, teach and give intuitive readings, so I completely shifted my focus. Somehow I made it through. Once again, my gifts saved my life.
Everyone needs someone and something to love. From the weekend painter and the impassioned chef to the dedicated mother who always wanted children. The passionate teacher and coach, who inspires students to be the best they can be, motivating and inspiring them to set high standards for themselves. From the rocket ship maker who dreamed of riding spaceships at five years old, and the child that licked the frosting off her mother’s cookies who baked her way to creating her own cookie brand.
I am back to performing again, and I’m teaching intuitive classes and giving readings. Doing what I love is an honor. It’s a gift not only to me but for others. My gifts rescued me a few times. They stopped me from giving up on life. Committing to what you came here to do is an act of love, of loving yourself through your gift and loving who made you. What a precious treasure to have been given.
Tatiana is a spiritual teacher, psychic-intuitive, intuitive life coach, creator of music and healing meditations, Angel Therapy Practitioner® and Angel Therapy Medium® She’s passionate about helping people move forward and overcome their fears, ditch procrastination and do what they love. She’s released three albums and shares her moon phase oracle card readings @www.tatianascavnicky.com
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