Each year we make new goals, really feel committed, and they often turn out to be the same goals, perhaps worded differently, as last years. These goals are based on unhealed wounds and patterns of being which are as yet unrecognized. Start recognizing your wounds by being mindful of when you feel defensive or have defensive thoughts.
You can start recognizing your wounds by seeing what and whom you are attracting to yourself. When wounds come up, we feel and act defensively. That leaves us defending exactly where we have been, not allowing for growth and change. As the Law of Attraction states, we attract that to which we vibrate and are similar to our innermost thoughts and beliefs. If you defend your old way of being, that’s where you stay, and attract more of that. So, if you can be aware of those defensive feelings as a signal of a wound, you can heal and change your life.
You can also take situations that you are negative about and heal them. So, if your goal is to get a new job because you are unhappy at work, (especially if this is a common situation), like feeling others are judging you, are you a) judging others? and/or b) judging yourself? Really feel about that, not just think about it. Feeling comes from deep down, it’s when you get out of your head. Acknowledge the feeling inside that is connected with judgment, embrace it and breath into it so that you can really feel it. Notice how old you feel; chances are you are feeling young.
That’s a signal that this feeling is from a childhood wound. As this wound is unfelt, unhealed and unresolved, it continues to be part of your foundation of being and so, in this case, attracts that job to you so you can work it out. This job is actually a holy encounter, part of a divine plan for your highest good. Something to keep in mind is that EVERYTHING YOU EXPERIENCE IS FOR YOUR HIGHEST GOOD.
That being said, in this case, acknowledging your judgments, starting with your feelings, gives you the opportunity to grow towards fulfilling your highest potential. In this case, you can do this by starting to notice how you judge yourself. Do you call yourself stupid? Keep telling yourself how unhappy you are? Judge how you can be “stuck at this job?
Let’s say you are lonely, and last year you had the goal of dating that never really materialized. Take what is above. Feel inside the loneliness. Really allow yourself to embrace it deeply. Notice how young you feel. Notice how you tend to abandon yourself. There’s many ways to abandon yourself, you just have to feel and notice them. Such as, do you eat healthy? Do you look in the mirror and notice what you like about yourself? Keep to a budget? Just feel how you feel when you are lonely… and the other times you feel the same way… those are most likely times when you are abandoning yourself. Be your own best date and you’ll be so attractive, others will flock around you, wanting to be in your energy. Law of Attraction: You will attract experiences that are in vibration with you.
This technique will work towards obtaining your goals in any situation: love life, work, finances, relationships, any situation you find yourself in. So will the next technique, looking at your thoughts.
Again, what you think about in your innermost thoughts attracts that experience to you. This means your TRUE INNERMOST THOUGHTS, not the affirmations you want to think. Affirmations can be of use, yet it’s slower, working from the outside in, saying it until you make it. A faster and deeper way is to notice your true thoughts and be mindful to document them in your journal. As you start documenting them in your journal, your subconscious mind will help you, letting more come out. You can then reframe your negative thoughts into positive ones.
Let’s say you find that you say to yourself, “I’m never good enough.” That’s a fairly common thought many of my clients have. You can then choose to reframe that with, “I’m good just as I am” or “It doesn’t have to be perfect.” Even “I am divine and perfect just as I am.” And yes, most people who have the limited belief that they and nothing they do is ever good enough are… you guessed it… perfectionists as a defense to childhood wounds. The true issue in this case is the need to be perfect. Then, anytime you find yourself saying to yourself “I’m never good enough” you can replace it with “I am divine and good just as I am.” Or, “I did my best and my best is good enough.” Whatever you choose, the more you say it, as it is closely related to what you actually tell yourself, the slight changes will be more accepted and reprogrammed into your subconscious and consciousness faster and faster, more and more easily.
Taking the first goal, a new job, if you find yourself saying to yourself, “I’ll never be happy here” you can reframe that to, “I can choose to be happy right where I am.” You can even go further and say to yourself, “I am right where I am meant to be. What can I work on now?” Chances are, when you find yourself liking where you work, liking yourself, you will be offered great jobs you weren’t even looking for.
As you begin working through your feelings and healing your childhood wounds, transforming your negative thoughts into ones of a higher vibration, you will attract those experiences that will allow you to achieve your goals, or the goals that are most helpful for you in your growth.
Have a blessed year!
Love and Light,
Miche Lame’