Part 1 – Self Love
by Barbra WhiteCrow
As a divine being awakening to Itself, you may find it paradoxical that you possess everything and yet still need self-love. However, this is a fundamental truth. With clear intention and spiritual practices like meditation and self-love, you can unlock the seeds of your divine essence—abundance, creativity, and beauty. The more tenderly you treat your emotions and care for your body, the more you can connect with your True Self, a crucial step in your journey of personal growth.
It’s important to honor your feelings and needs, take the time to feel, and truly understand the needs behind those feelings. Self-love is essential for cultivating open-hearted and direct communication. Those socialized as men may find empathizing with your emotions and needs challenging. Through my experience facilitating men’s circles alongside my partner Dave, I’ve noticed that many men struggle with this, often due to patriarchal messaging that encourages emotional repression—messages like “don’t be a sissy” or “don’t be weak.”
Until they engage in their own inner work, they may respond to another’s pain by making it about themselves, asking, “What did I do wrong?” or saying, “You are too emotional,” instead of listening with empathy and saying, “I hear you,” or “What do you need?”
It’s crucial not to let their initial resistance stifle your emotions and needs. You teach others how to treat you; by allowing men to explore their vulnerability while honoring your own, you can maintain a connection to your True Beautiful Self and foster nourishing relationships.
At its core, self-love involves listening to your body’s needs, recognizing and honoring your feelings, establishing clear boundaries, loving all parts of yourself, and building habits that respect and uplift you.
Fundamentally, you are already the One you seek, and embracing this truth can help you attract a remarkable partner or enrich your current relationship.
Dave Tuscany:
“The hardest thing a man will ever do is love all of himself completely.” I’ve been sharing this message with various men’s groups I’ve led for decades, and it remains just as relevant today as it was then.
Immediately, men often respond, “Look at what I’ve done wrong; look at how my addictions have led me to seek help.” Yes, these shadow beliefs that we hide, repress, and project onto others have often caused us significant trouble in the past. But can I love these troublesome parts of myself as well as the more likable ones? Yes!
The concept of shadow “work” is really about shadow integration. It entails accepting and loving all of these beliefs that I previously viewed as unfavorable or unrecognizable parts of me. How can I find the “gold” in each of these beliefs or parts and integrate them? Through self-love.
Self-love is about having compassion for each of these repressed or hidden beliefs and expressing gratitude for them. It involves appreciating those parts for helping to keep me safe, making me feel loved, and perhaps even aiding in my survival in the past.
How can we love those beliefs or parts that may have caused us pain? We thank them for the service we unconsciously asked them to provide years ago and recognize and honor them for their faithful service over the decades. Self-love involves renegotiating with each of these parts and reminding them that, while I’m grateful for their service, I am now in control.
When I lean into accepting and embracing all of my parts, something shifts deep within me—I find the One. When I can genuinely have compassion and love for every aspect of myself, this shift becomes even more profound. By taking a deep breath and consciously sending love to all parts of myself, I feel as if I’ve truly arrived back home to the One.
It is a fundamental truth that we can only love and empathize with others to the extent that we love and empathize with ourselves.
Join us for the ‘Finding The One’ program, held online on Monday nights from 6 to 9 p.m. starting February 3rd. This transformative program consists of four sessions. For more information or to sign up, visit MotherBearSanctuary.com or email motherbearbarbra@gmail.com.
Awaken self-love, discover true intimacy, learn conscious communication, and reignite your passion. The entire program, which is only $197, includes all four sessions and is a valuable investment in your personal growth.
Additionally, Finding The One-Day Intensive is on March 29th from 10–6 p.m. $197 in person at Mother Bear Sanctuary in Pinckney, Michigan.
Benefit from our 40+ years of combined facilitation experience and Find The One. Our online and in-person options are co-ed, trauma-informed, and expertly facilitated. Singles and couples welcome: Come Find the One!!
Barbra White and Dave Tuscany are transformative leaders dedicated to personal and collective healing. Barbra is a body-based therapist, spiritual teacher, and trauma healer who empowers self-love and holistic health. Dave, a life coach and Certified Fire-Walk Instructor, guides individuals to wholeness through transformational experiences. Together, they inspire connection, growth, and harmony.
